Wanna have some fun while at work? Staples has a neat contest and statement generator, where you can put some words in, hit the button and see what kind of statement it generates.
Here is what I came up with:
I'm God, and I am an office manager. Although this is my official title, it's more accurate to say that I'm stupid. A day in my work life is like a day in/at Disneyland because I'm always working smoking crack.
The most unusual thing I've ever had to as an office manager is pretend I care. The office product that best represent what I do is the plunger because it is hard to break.
The best part of my day is when I can start drinking at my desk and throwing stuff out the window at passers-by when everyone else goes to lunch.
By the way, my office is on the ground level and my windows can't open, so that posting is not true.