“There are distinct steps one must take to recover from a mistake,” says Wendy Kaufman, president of Balancing Life’s Issues, Inc., a provider of training seminars on enhancing work/life balance.

First, the person who made the mistake has to process what he or she has done. “The immediate human reaction is to say, ‘I didn’t do this,’ which makes the mistake even worse. If you don’t process the mistake, you’ll never get to the next step,” Kaufman says.

Kaufman was asked to coach a senior executive and his boss who had a tense relationship. She says, “Their bad relationship can all be traced back to the day when the senior executive blew off a meeting with his boss. The boss found his behavior unprofessional and disrespectful. In truth, they never got past this incident because the senior executive never took responsibility for his actions.”

Second, the person must own the mistake in its entirety and show remorse. “You immediately lose credibility if you place blame,” Kaufman says. “Don’t bring up extenuating circumstances. If you’re late, don’t blame it on the traffic because there is always traffic or accidents or whatever.”

Dan Meyerson, senior vice president of leadership and development, Bank of America, agrees and adds, “I always say, ‘Bask in the glory of your mistake.’ In other words, be comfortable with it and show others you can come back even stronger after making a mistake. It’s important to show that it won’t affect your self-esteem.”

Last of all, clearly outline an action plan to ensure the mistake doesn’t happen again. “This way, the boss can think I’m really angry but she owned it and has a new plan. What more can I ask?’” Kaufman says.